What is Gaslighting?
Updated: Mar 23, 2019
How many of you have somebody that makes you feel wrong or inadequate based on false accusations, and then you try to see the rightness of their point of view?
That is gaslighting.
I've been looking at this topic of Gaslighting recently. Something keeps pinging me to expose the elements that allow people to be under the gaslighting spell. Following are 2 warning signs (out of 11 that I will be reviewing in my March tele-call series.)
Warning sign #1. They tell blatant lies. You know it's an outright lie. Yet they are telling you this lie with a straight face. Why are they so blatant? Because they're setting up a precedent. Once they tell you a huge lie, you're not sure if anything they say is true. Keeping you unsteady and off-kilter is the goal.
Warning sign #6. They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you.. This person or entity that is cutting you down, telling you that you don't have value, is now praising you for something you did. This adds an additional sense of uneasiness. You think, "Well maybe they aren't so bad." Yes, they are. This is a calculated attempt to keep you off-kilter—and again, to question your reality. Also look at what you were praised for; it is probably something that served the gaslighter.
What is the antidote? The antidote to gaslighting is awareness. And Access is full of tools to expand your awareness. IPOV (Interesting point of view) is one of the greatest tools to diffuse a gaslighter.